Today is just not your day: The Game

[JustaDumbThriver (He who has the IQ of a half-eaten Wendy's Baconator(tm))]

And like the holy ROMAN empire, you are an absolute jigsaw puzzle.
Today is a divided day.
You are the Kingdom of Bavaria.

[aah31415 (The maker of SitF, Radiostrocity, The Lifenote and TGBing; The Second Ascended...; And just maybe a security warning come alive...?)]

Not just any Bavaria, RETRO bavaria it is!
Today is a strange country day.
You now are the mario-duchy of Austria.

[AnthropocenianAge (𝒜𝓇𝓉𝒽𝓇𝑜𝓅𝓁𝑒𝓊𝓇𝒶 𝓌𝒶𝓃𝓉𝓈 𝓉𝑜 𝑔𝒾𝓋𝑒 𝓎𝑜𝓊 𝒶 𝒽𝓊𝑔!)]

And everyone knows the best thing from Bavaria.
Today is a very roasted day.
You are Bavarian Roasted Nuts.

[aah31415 (The maker of SitF, Radiostrocity, The Lifenote and TGBing; The Second Ascended...; And just maybe a security warning come alive...?)]

The nuts are all pixelly, for the glory of the retro empire still shines through.
Today is a distorted day.
You now are the Empire of Retrospain.

[JustaDumbThriver (He who has the IQ of a half-eaten Wendy's Baconator(tm))]

You discover the americas, colonize the place, and then lose it hundreds of year later.
Today is Cinco de Mayo.
You are Retromexico.

[aah31415 (The maker of SitF, Radiostrocity, The Lifenote and TGBing; The Second Ascended...; And just maybe a security warning come alive...?)]

Your citizens discover the scrat ruins…
Today is an yet another day of a turning point.
You now are the scrat republic of Mexico, fighting the retromexican state.

[AnthropocenianAge (𝒜𝓇𝓉𝒽𝓇𝑜𝓅𝓁𝑒𝓊𝓇𝒶 𝓌𝒶𝓃𝓉𝓈 𝓉𝑜 𝑔𝒾𝓋𝑒 𝓎𝑜𝓊 𝒶 𝒽𝓊𝑔!)]

And to the South in Central Scaterica, your old enemies have returned.
Today is a very Aztec day.
You are now a Smilodon worshiped as a god king by remaining sapient Neo-Ice Age creatures.

[aah31415 (The maker of SitF, Radiostrocity, The Lifenote and TGBing; The Second Ascended...; And just maybe a security warning come alive...?)]

What have we created with all this ice age stuff at this point?

[AnthropocenianAge (𝒜𝓇𝓉𝒽𝓇𝑜𝓅𝓁𝑒𝓊𝓇𝒶 𝓌𝒶𝓃𝓉𝓈 𝓉𝑜 𝑔𝒾𝓋𝑒 𝓎𝑜𝓊 𝒶 𝒽𝓊𝑔!)]

I don’t really know…

And in North America, a new Mississippian cat civilization arises.
Today is a very lionizing day.
You are now the leader of the previously thought-extinct North American Lions.

[JustaDumbThriver (He who has the IQ of a half-eaten Wendy's Baconator(tm))]

You get phased out for North American Tigers.
Hey, Rayman knows being replaced by the Rabbids.
You are a North American Tiger.

[AnthropocenianAge (𝒜𝓇𝓉𝒽𝓇𝑜𝓅𝓁𝑒𝓊𝓇𝒶 𝓌𝒶𝓃𝓉𝓈 𝓉𝑜 𝑔𝒾𝓋𝑒 𝓎𝑜𝓊 𝒶 𝒽𝓊𝑔!)]

And in the hot deserts, where the North American Tigers rarely roam.
Today is a day for re-introductions.
You are now a civ of sapient Western Camels.

[aah31415 (The maker of SitF, Radiostrocity, The Lifenote and TGBing; The Second Ascended...; And just maybe a security warning come alive...?)]

You get domesticated by some wild scrat-human hybrids leftover from the now-largely-fallen human civilization.
Today is a strange day.
You now are the last american lion which discovered that there’s a strange artifact located at the core of Earth, the shape of a terror bird…

[AnthropocenianAge (𝒜𝓇𝓉𝒽𝓇𝑜𝓅𝓁𝑒𝓊𝓇𝒶 𝓌𝒶𝓃𝓉𝓈 𝓉𝑜 𝑔𝒾𝓋𝑒 𝓎𝑜𝓊 𝒶 𝒽𝓊𝑔!)]

Along the way back, the terror bird statue points the last american lion to find another neo-Ice Age animal thought to be extinct.
Today is a very long nose day.
You are now sapient de-extinct California tapirs.

[JustaDumbThriver (He who has the IQ of a half-eaten Wendy's Baconator(tm))]

Your long nose becomes so long that it is more harm than good.
Today is going to be very annoying.
You are a nose cell.

[AnthropocenianAge (𝒜𝓇𝓉𝒽𝓇𝑜𝓅𝓁𝑒𝓊𝓇𝒶 𝓌𝒶𝓃𝓉𝓈 𝓉𝑜 𝑔𝒾𝓋𝑒 𝓎𝑜𝓊 𝒶 𝒽𝓊𝑔!)]

This nose cell knows something.
Today is wolf day in the very Northern parts of former Scaterica.
You are now sentient Beringian Wolfs who live like the Inuit.

[aah31415 (The maker of SitF, Radiostrocity, The Lifenote and TGBing; The Second Ascended...; And just maybe a security warning come alive...?)]

You hunt a bunch of stupid scrats down.
Today is a feast day.
You now are a scrat digging down to the core.

[AnthropocenianAge (𝒜𝓇𝓉𝒽𝓇𝑜𝓅𝓁𝑒𝓊𝓇𝒶 𝓌𝒶𝓃𝓉𝓈 𝓉𝑜 𝑔𝒾𝓋𝑒 𝓎𝑜𝓊 𝒶 𝒽𝓊𝑔!)]

Like the Great Scrat Ancestor, you do something cataclysmic.
Today is a very core day.
You accidentally break apart the continents by running on top of the core.

[aah31415 (The maker of SitF, Radiostrocity, The Lifenote and TGBing; The Second Ascended...; And just maybe a security warning come alive...?)]

One continent is terrorbird-shaped.
Today is a reminiscent day.
You now are a new terror bird species that evolved on this continent.

[AnthropocenianAge (𝒜𝓇𝓉𝒽𝓇𝑜𝓅𝓁𝑒𝓊𝓇𝒶 𝓌𝒶𝓃𝓉𝓈 𝓉𝑜 𝑔𝒾𝓋𝑒 𝓎𝑜𝓊 𝒶 𝒽𝓊𝑔!)]

Not just any terror bird species.
Today is a special day.
You are the 999th terror bird comment of this Forum Game.

[aah31415 (The maker of SitF, Radiostrocity, The Lifenote and TGBing; The Second Ascended...; And just maybe a security warning come alive...?)]

This seems pretty boring now.
Today is a new day.
You now are a sapient elephant bird.