I did some research and concluded that hyllaineir must be related to arnold scahdjfjfkemndne, due to a very obvious reasonā¦ both are living things
@zenzonegaming please donāt triple post
Several of my friends are living things, what does this mean for them?
They probably live underwater, doing things like barbecuing in hydrothermal forges or watching ponyo again.
Fortunately this is not a problem for me and you, as I am a robot and you are a ghost.
I guess
Case 19:
WHY WILL THE MISC THREAD STOP AT 10000 POSTS?
I have recently been notified that the misc thread, a well known thread that has been on the forum for years, will close once it has received itās 10000th post.
Why is that? Is it aliens? Is it ghosts? Is it ghost aliens? Is it so that the forumās code doesnāt overwhelm itself?
HAHAHAHA no
These are all ludicrous conspiracy theories and couldnāt be further from the truth.
The truth which is that Hyrialnian is conspiring with Neptune, god of the sea.
What is my proof for this conspiracy truth? Hehe
10000 times 10 (which is coincidentally the year that Neptune was born) is 100000, which divided by 2 (the current age of the universe) is 50000, which times 2000 (a rounding of Neptuneās age) equals 100000000, which is exactly how long ago Hyrealianina was born
Heyaina is also a merman, and thus worships Neptune alongside Thor the god of thunder.
Hrinaoidnanlf309r was beseeched by Neptune to not allow the post count for any thread in the community forum to go above 10000, and, beholden by his faith, Hyuaion followed his godās orders.
This act of reckless tyranny has left thrive in shambles ever since.
But why would Neptune care so much?
Hereās a better question, idiot, why WOULDNāT he care so much?
10000 times 12 is 120000, which minus 20000 equals 100000, minus one equals 99999, plus one equals 100000 again, which times 0 equals, 0, the year that Jesus Christ was born.
This is irrefutable proof that Neptune, feeling all jelly after Christianity beat out his religion, decided to sabotage the thrive forums to slander our lord and saviorās name.
This is why HUANinsaonlairiyanianl must be banned, before it is too late.
Now hereās a second case file, to really hammer home how much Huainoilan needs to get banned
Case 20:
WHY DID H3Y4IQN BAN KIKIGAMES AND REDNASCAR TO THE SHADOW REALM?
Everyone knew that Kikigames and Rednascar did nothing wrong, but Hryauinal, like the evil tyrant he is, banished them to the shadow realm. It was likely over their alleged rudeness to other users, but we all knew that isnāt true, they were the most upstanding users that thrive ever had!
They complimented other users and wished them well on their birthdays, the celebrated the holidays with a fervent passion, and they even helped old women cross the street.
Clearly the posts that contained this alleged ārudenessā was FORGED by the evil no good Hyinalina, in a wicked bid to worsen the community forum and revel in Kikigamesā and Rednascarās suffering.
Once he had turned the communityās opinion of the duo negative, he mercilessly hit them with the evil soul stealing laser beam that he carries at all times, and sent them to the shadow realm.
Are you happy now HYruinlina?! Are you happy?!
This is yet more proof that Hyrionalin must be banned
Here is another to REALLY hammer it home
Case 21:
WHY DID HRUAINA EAT THOSE KITTENS?
We all saw it, we all saw Hyaidna pick up a huge basket of kittens, unhinge his jaw and eat them all like the monstrous merman that he is, so why does no one talk about it?!
He must be banned, for those kittens that he gobbled up and melted with his stomach acids.
Hereās one more
Case 22:
WHY IS HTIALNA NOW SUING ME FOR SLANDER?
He is accusing me of slander, of conspiring against the community forums, and racism against merfolk (which is made illegal under the English 1986 Salmon Act (damn fish loversā¦)).
HA! As if that stinking fish man could find any proof of things like that! 
ing gillie.
This is yet more proof that the swimmer currently in control of the community forums is 100% evil, just like the rest of his kindā¦
We must ban the hideous deep one before it is too late!
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Disc āzenzonegamingā could not be read.
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If the problem persists, please contact us at revolutionarygamesstudio.com for replacement.
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Mini-case 6:
WHY HASNāT EDDIE MURPHY MADE A NUTTY PROFESSOR 2?
I watch it again and again, mainly because itās stuck in the VCR player, I canāt get it out of my head. Iām constantly thinking about one thing, and one thing only.
The Nutty Professor, itās the only thing I think about anymore.
There needs to be a sequel.
I must see Eddie Murphy in the fat suit once more, even if just for a minute. I must hear the exquisite fart jokes. I must feel the divine presence of Sherman Klump.
When will it be released?!
I keep emailing him, writing him, messaging him, calling him, skyping him, zooming him, throwing brick notes through his windows, and sneaking into his home at night but he still wonāt make sequel to the greatest movie ever made.
I would gladly sell the organs of my two assistants if it meant being able to watch it, please Eddie, I know you need a kidney.
Especially after I took one of them last night.
This is why Iām petitioning to create a new constitution, that would contractually oblige Eddie Murphy and all of his descendants to make Nutty Professor movies for the rest of their lives.
Iām made of shadows I donāt have organs, so youād be scamming him.
I guess you could say thatās prettyā¦
SHADY
Keeping him in the dark
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Yeah I bet his deal would be overshadowed by another if this continues to be the case
Mini case 6:
WHY HAS THRIVE NOT BEEN FINISHED YET?
For over a decade people have been working, slaving over Thrive and yet we still do not have a finished product, the space stage, the civilization stage, not even the multicellular stage!
It is physically impossible for a game to be in development this long, Einsteinās most famous law of physics is that it always takes under 5 years to develop a game, anything more is just wack yo.
Yes thatās a direct quote.
And so it since it is physically impossible for it to be taking this long, it can only mean one thing.
That Greta Thunberg and the ghost of Mahatma Gandhi are conspiring with Prince George and North Korea in order to sabotage Thrive so that they can release their knockoff, Prosper, and make trillions of Canadian loonies.
It is the only thing that makes any sense at all, and it is why we must form a petition to formally beseech Zimbabweās government to make a giant statue of Vlad the Impaler. Which through some rather convoluted things that Iād much rather not talk about, will stop their plan and make a full Thrive game release in 3 days time!
Case 23:
WHY HAS NO ONE BECOME ASCENDED YET?
The community forums have existed for 5 years now, and has had countless people who have quickly zoomed to becoming spacefaring (Roboromb and Mechanicalpumpkin specifically) and yet in that entire time, NO ONE has become ascended yet.
Why is this?
Is it because aliens have come to the community forum and stolen the ascended group from the code?
Is it because that Goddamn gillie Hyrianlinani stole all of the power for himself and his disgusting people?
Or is it simply because the designers severely overestimated how much people would post and set a ridiculously high number of posts to achieve the final tier.
No, itās because Vladimir Putin has infiltrated the forums and is slowly trying to make Russia ascended so that they will finally be able to reclaim Russiaās lost territory (including Alaska) and become a glorious union once more.
But how would he be able to do this? Russia is a land of potato farmers, vodka makers, and bear fighters. They donāt have any hackers.
But do you know who does? Thatās right.
Once I realized that Russia couldnāt possibly have done the infiltration alone I investigated deeper and found out something incredibly shocking.
That they used Ukrainian hackers to infiltrate the thrive community forum!
Thatās right, the entire war was just a ruse to get us to think that theyāre the worst of enemies, but look a little closer, specifically at their leaders.
Vladimir Putin, Vladimir Zelensky, they have the same name. Coincidence? I think not!
I also discovered that Russia and several other formerly soviet countries had tricked the entire world into believing that they used a western naming system, when in fact they use an EASTERN naming system.
That means that Putin and Zelensky arenāt their family names, theyāre their given names!
They were brothers the whole time! (mindblowing)
Putin-san and Zelensky-san have now successfully stolen the ascended tier from thrive, and if we donāt stop them soon then they will reform the soviet union!
This is why Iām formally petitioning the Mexican government to use their secret nuclear stockpile to destroy eastern Europe and northern Asia.
Starting just east of Germany and stopping once it starts to hit Canada. Itās okay that a lot of eastern European countries are going to get caught in the crossfire, all they ever gave the world was Borat, and they canāt exactly do Borat again.
Mini case 7:
WHY ARE SOME USERS NO LONGER ON THRIVE?
Recently I have been made aware that several hundred users on thrive has suddenly vanished over the years, how this flew under everyoneās radar I will never know.
I did some investigating into as many of the missing peoples that I could, I was nearly overwhelmed by the sheer quantity of how many people have gone missing until I noticed one thing.
DPHkraken, in his profile are the words (they/them), presumable theyās preferred pronouns.
But why would someone call themselves multiple people unlessā¦
DPhkraken is an eldritch hive mind entity that has murdered and absorbed countless people! This is further evidenced by theyās location, which is right behind you, presumably so that it is easier to murder and absorb people.
Even further evidenced by the kraken part of theyās name!
And them also described theyselves as ādangerously photosyntheticā, this must be how them gains sustenanceā¦
And thus I have found the only solution to these obvious murders, we must blow up the sun, after a while DPHkraken will starve and stop picking us off one by one.
Iāve already called in a favor with a guy I know at Dennyās, so itās only a few hours away till the sun blows up, youāre welcome world.
cool
Case 10,000 BC:
OOGA BOOGA, WHY CRUG TAKE EXTRA BOAR MEAT
Crug gatherer, Crug no participate in hunt, but Crug takeā¦ uhā¦ allā¦ hands of boar meat.
Suspicious
Zen decide to investigate Crug, find out shocking thing.
Crug no man, he hard skin monster, have more arms than man, big lookie balls.
Zen fight Crug monster, Crug monster win, cover Zen with sticky rope and put in cave
But then dark man come to cave and save Zen, bash Crug head with stone
Say his name Twi- Twir- Twil- say his name Twi, know Zenās little Zenās little Zenās little Zenās little Zenās little Zenās little Zenās little Zenās little Zenās little Zenās something something.
Then Twi leave Zen and Zen go back to tribe
Zen told tribe what Crug did to Zen, tribe no believe, make Zen leave.
Small tribe man also made leave, Zen canāt remember name, Zen now calling him Butler.
Hehe, but.
Now Zen draw funny stick mans on cave wall to pass time.
- translated caveman drawings.
Donāt use visible post padding. Use any of the non-visible ways.
This sounds like 2 millions years ago not 10000
Rule number 1 of the paranormal cases: Donāt try to find sense, Just read.
Ok, Mister agent of āLeviathan, lord of envyā
I see now everything
we need to get zen a passive-aggressive vacation.
he need to relax from all the investigation meanwhile we will fix his anti-time machine. that on me.